I’ve been out walking, in the rain, battered by wild west winds and, for good measure, basked in a splash of sunshine. It has undoubtedly been springtime weather here in Auckland and, to be fair, most of New Zealand. During the week, I have had to dig deep to get my motivation on track. With that, I set myself some goals. One which I will share is my desire to wander down as many new streets and roads around Newmarket, Parnell, and Remuera. When freedom is granted, I might head up a few hills further afield. Each day, this will help me keep my head and body busy positively and not dwell on the what-ifs.
Named and Tamed
When, on my walk up and down a few gullies, I thought about life’s seemingly never-ending journey stumbling over boulders, as you do when walking by yourself. During the last few days, I could’ve easily stayed put in a gully and become a swamp creature like Shrek, but instead, with support, I took the option of getting my shit together and headed right up those steps into the light and sunshine. I admit to feeling quite overwhelmed and very emotional during the last few days. My overactive brain was becoming a bad imitation of a spinning top resulting in that small irrational inner self creating havoc with my emotions.
I am pleased to say that the inner demon was put to rest that day by naming it and taming it. I’m now more than aware that I need to practice self-care, manage stress, fill those long hours with things I love to do. Try to live in the moment, ask for help when I need it, connect with our loving supporters by chatting and not messaging all the time, and importantly celebrate the small steps in the Squires recovery.
Today’s gem was finding the Newmarket Park, which did see me walking up hills and down into a few gully’s, though no sign of Shrek, praying on more than one occasion that the path would lead me back to civilisation once again. Not that I was scared being by myself amongst the moving bushes. Okay, I lie. Though I am no shrinking violet, I was more than a tad apprehensive being on a track I wasn’t used to, right out of my comfort zone. All said and done, it was a good morning’s discovery, even if I did feel slightly uncomfortable and a little bit scared.
A Snippet of history about Newmarket Park
The land a while back had the dubious title of the most dangerous park as it had been used as a landfill from 1930s to the 1940s during which period contaminants entered the ground. At this time the park was also used as a recreational site for athletics and midget car racing. Then in the sixties it was the home of a local football club, where international games were played, whose shabby stadium unceremoniously fell down the bank. Unlike the UK way of saying goodbye (West Ham losing their beloved Boleyn) to defunct club rooms by crowd brutality whereas us New Zealanders do it in a more sedate way by leaving mother nature to do her thing, both having the same effect, demolition. I am very pleased to report after a grand makeover and spending millions the area is now a nature sanctuary enjoyed by many locals including myself.