Auckland, Cancer Sucks, The Good Fight

Keeping up the Good Fight #4

When a Haematology Specialist uses excellent within their first sentence when reviewing your status, you know that today is a winner, and I also get to use the F-word followed by a yes. Not every day since the Squires discharge has been a good one, though the Squire has been in a reasonably stable condition compared to many other stem cell transplant patients. His blood count is in no way average. Not yet, and it won’t be for a while. There are more issues to occur, and the journey isn’t over just yet. As I write this, the Squire is on Day 65; that number’s calculated from the transplant day. Day 65 was a good day and a treat day which today equates to food.

Food glorious Food

Memorable Moment, captured at a BnB in the Lakes District, U.K.

Our first date involved food; our best adventurous travel memories were based on enjoying delectable food. We love food; we love to stimulate our senses with food. Unfortunately, this has led us to need to rid ourselves of a few kilograms or more than one occasion. Will we reach a point when eating becomes less quilt ridden? Who knows? Well, for one of us, the pendulum has swung to the affirmative. There’s always a first time for everything. A monumental moment of having encouragement to indulge has occurred with his cancer specialist advising him not to lose any more weight and put some of that lost weight back on. No, I am not at all envious, okay, maybe a smidgen. I’m human; it happens. My enjoyment occurs when I get to be a dutiful wife; that also happens occasionally. Being dedicated and supplying him with some good fats and just downright tempting treats like a big fat meaty pie often occur. In between the treats is the need for supplement drinks that aren’t too foul as chocolate has been added. Now on the subject of chocolate, we have a large assortment of choccy filled treats for those moments when energy and appetite are low. Why not?

The Goldilocks Zone

A random Squire fishing moment when we camped at Auckland’s Regional Park – Shakesphere, a few moons ago. No fish caught and it was still a magical moment watching the sun go down.

After five weeks in hospital, and eventually the Squires discharge, you would think that we would be over having stress affect us. Funnily enough, the unknown seems to be testing our endurance, our patience like driving a car at night without lights. What the heck was that bump, we ask? The waiting lull. The anxiety of wondering the what-ifs. Will today be the day he reacts to his drugs, or his organs have a wobbly?. These are daily questions; most are answered by the end of the day, some linger to be repeated at 3 am. Why do our human brains think it’s okay to wake the body up at an ungodly hour and play the question game? No answer.

Then there is the bug stress, no, not the millions of ants that threaten to derail my sanity by marching along the wall heading directly towards the kitchen; it’s the unseen bugs that I may bring in with me from outside. The ones you can’t squash, wouldn’t that be wonderful to be able to decimate bugs of all kinds with one slam of a wet cloth or spray if that’s your thing. Now that I have mentioned the b-word, we will ask you the loaded question; are you vaxxed? Before we mix and mingle because if you aren’t, you can’t be in our company. We are entering a new phase of adjusting to what has happened and knowing that there is no way back to our formal selves. Life has changed for both of us. Cancer etched a pattern into our life that’s erasable; we will use that experience to move us forward. Eventually, to it not being our focus, one day, it will just be a motivator to enjoy each day and be forever thankful that Les’s brother was able to give the Squire another chance at life.

So today we both got to go for our various walks, one was together just a kilometre which for the Squire is like me completing 10kms. He’s chuffed, we both are, and best of all, we enjoyed being in the moment. Small steps.

46 thoughts on “Keeping up the Good Fight #4”

  1. Small steps indeed Suz, but great to read about the discharge and subsequent days. My sister’s husband is undergoing chemotherapy and the vaccination question is a very relevant one to them too. Enjoy that food!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Your words are so upbeat (and the Rainbow is spectacular). It is all a process and finding the silver linings along the way. Itโ€™s good to be part of a team when going through rough patches and their aftermath. Enjoy the food (even you) without guilt. Best wishes for Lesโ€™s continued recovery.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Small steps maybe, but significant and positive ones nevertheless, and great to hear of them. Yes, that ‘are you vaxxed?’ question will be an important one for you to ask, but tbh I think we should all be asking it to some extent at least.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Small steps so much better than no steps, Suzanne. But then the angst about vaccine? As I understand it, if you have taken whatever steps are available, whether those you come into contact with have the vaccine or not isn’t relevant to your health? It will protect them, hopefully, but is a guarantee for nobody. Harsh reality, but you are on such a positive track. Wish you all the luck in the world ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks very much, Jo. Les has no immunity to anything at the moment, as he will need all his immunisations repeated when he gets to Day100 or when he’s healthier enough to handle it.
      It is a difficult environment for the healthy to navigate let alone those that are immunocompromised. All we can do is wear masks when appropriate, keep your distance from those you don’t know and have high hygiene practices and cross your fingers you aren’t one of the unfortunate that follow all of those practices and still get it. I still think the world is making it up as we go along this new way of living.


  5. You are so right in your first sentense Suzanne. Specialists/Consultants are not prone to use superlatives or allow optimism. Quite the opposite. Enjoy the moments – both of you. It’s a long and bumpy road you are on, but crikey, you’ve covered some distance already, and are still doing well. Enjoy the wind at your back and the sun on your face. Enjoy your walks. Make the most of the good bits, to sustain you through the crap bits. Thanks for sharing.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks very much, Ross and good to see you in blogland ๐Ÿ˜‰ Yes, it has been a long journey with more to come. We have certainly appreciated both yours and Wyn’s support. Wyn especially needs a medal for getting me through some tricky moments when I did pick up the phone!.


  6. How lovely to read such a positive post, Suzanne, and to know that hubby is progressing in a good way. May it continue and may you spend a really happy Christmas, eating all the lovely food you so enjoy. Carpe diem!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks very much, Mari. We are taking each day as it comes and no idea if we will be home for Christmas or needing to stay in Auckland. Whatever happens, food will be the star of the day ๐Ÿ˜‰


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